okay so on a nostalgic whim i recently made a neopets account to see what just what has happened in the decade that i have been away
there’s a lot, A LOT i have to say about this site after a few days of play, but the most surreal thing is how things have basically not changed at all in that decade. the site runs like shit because the optimization is terrible, for one, but the most striking & surreal thing is that the site’s art is updated in some places but not others
like you have areas like tyrannia that look like this
and then you have meridell that still looks exactly like it did over a decade ago and i’m losing my fucking shit
The two Jehovah’s Witnesses that always come to my door are alarmingly buff. Like, muscles-straining-through-their-white-dress-shirts buff. I don’t even have a joke to make about this, guys. I just feel like you should know that I am plagued by these righteously jacked proselytizers and that, for whatever reason, I’m constantly running into them at the grocery store and they always ask me how my cat is doing. It’s really somethin’.
Never forget going to the pet store with my dad and the guy at the register just points to a can of dog chicken and goes “you ever eat that stuff” and my dad goes “nope but I’m guessing you have” and the guy just goes “yup”
jean valjean: yes cosette i am your father mother have this doll you are safe now i love you there is no danger here
jean valjean 5 minutes later: shit it’s the feds run child FUCKING RUN AND HIDE
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