No one has seen you at your worst like your corner store cashier.
this is food delivery driver erasure
me quietly talking to other cars on the highway: please dont motherfucker
A while back I heard my friend (male) insult another dude by saying, “You look like the kind of guy who wouldn’t go to Wal-Mart to buy his girlfriend a box of tampons” and I still think about that crowning insult sometimes
My dad once called another guy “someone who thinks loading the dishwasher once in a while makes him less of a man”
I like your dad already
Love it on Christmas Day when a label on a present says “from mom and dad” and you just know that dad has absolutely no idea what’s inside
my son and a boy kitten was neutered today and man he is sad
his stupid niblet was hiding behind his bladder so they were waiting but he was six months old and still hiding it away
the poor baby is very out of it and is nauseous as hell but he’s at least drinking water like a good boy!!!
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