– You have to shower. You cannot shower. You are standing right in front of the shower. You want to shower. You cannot shower.
– The meeting begins. “Did everyone see the email?” There is a chorus of nodding heads. You nod, too. You think you may possibly have checked an email account before, on one single occasion, at some unknown time, probably in a past life.
– You are hungry. You have been hungry for three days now. The hunger has not spontaneously resolved itself. How inconvenient, you think. How rude.
– You depend on your planner/calendar. You loathe your planner/calendar. You can’t function without it. You live in constant fear of it. It’s an unhealthy relationship. You think you both should start seeing other people.
– There is a pile on your floor. It is a treasure trove, the Room of Requirement. It has everything. You look for something specific. It has nothing. There was never any pile.
– There’s been a change of plans, they say. You don’t understand. They repeat: “there’s been a change of plans.” You don’t understand. The mere suggestion causes a buzzing in your head that drowns out everything else. You don’t understand.
– You’re in class and you don’t understand the lecture. You look back at your past notes. You look at a calendar. You have not been to class in two weeks. You have no memory of this supposed time. Where did it go? Why did it leave?
– “Organizational tips for success: Keep a planner! Write it down! Stick to a schedule! Make a list!” You are torn between deranged laughter and ugly crying. You choose both.
this is so true it’s almost not funny. hysterical gigglesob combo is go.
top tier: “Elementary” is better than “Sherlock” because not only does it not have the racism, sexism and queer-baiting from the BBC adaption, it actually shows how smart Sherlock Holmes is instead of just telling you that the detective can do the impossible. The overall portrayal of Sherlock is much more true and actually shows him as a person instead of some hero who does things off screen we just have to believe. Even though “Elementary” might be lower budget and may feel inferior to “Sherlock”, it’s overall the better show and definitely more enjoyable to watch
god tier: “Elementary” is better than “Sherlock” because Jonny Lee Miller is hotter than Bumblebee Custardbath
galaxy brain: Elementary is better because it has Lucy Liu instead of Martin Freeman
my cat just scared himself with his own sneeze and ran into a wall
Land of Sweetness and Light 
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