– You’d swear you’d driven past that rock formation before, but the GPS has stopped working hours ago and there’s no use turning around now. The thermometer crawls upward, and you don’t remember the last gas station you passed. The numbers on the mile markers are random, arbitrary. You wonder if you’re still on Earth.
– Smoke tickles your eyes, your throat. You can smell it, taste it, but can’t see it. The world is on fire, somewhere to the west, and the flames creep closer every year. The locals light fireworks every night of July to prove they’re not afraid.
– Nothing lives in the water. Nothing ever has. Even the brine-flies don’t venture too far from the shoreline. The deeps are still and silent now, but no one talks anymore about the lost planes.
– There’s tracks in the snow that no one can identify. They’re buried by avalanches before they can be documented.
– A billboard along I-15 predicts the apocalypse. By the time you realize what you’ve just read, it’s already changed.
– There’s a monument along the mountain road, but no one will tell you what it’s commemorating. The local history books have been relocated to the archives. You’re not worthy to access the archives.
– The neighbor knows your name, though you’ve never met. You see her walk her children to the park, but they always look like different children than the day before. She leaves a tupperware of soup on your porch in the winter. You don’t know who told her you were sick. You never heard her walk up to the door.
One thing all cat owners can agree on.
Every time I see someone reblog my posts and tag them ‘q slur’ I feel pain.
I get it: you wanna make your followers comfortable. But did you think about me? How do you think I feel about my identity being called a slur every single day? As if I am something dangerous, traumatic or nsfw just by existing as queer?
I know you don’t think you’re doing harm, but I can feel the hurt, they’re little needles in my queer heart every single day. I’m tired of it.
I am QUEER. That is non-negotiable. That is where my strength comes from and my rage and my joy. No other term is ever going to describe who I am like ‘queer’. No other term is ever going to be my home like ‘queer’.
And I refuse to let my home get called a slur every single day when I know the strongest voices behind the ‘queer is a slur’ campaign don’t give a shit about triggers. they’re transphobes and aphobes and biphobes trying to crush to spaces where people can exist without clear labels. They’re the people that want to make my queerness disappear.
I am Queer. That is my soul. That is my rebellion. That is my solidarity. No ‘gay’ or ‘bi’ or ‘transgender’ label could set my heart aflame like that, could set me free like that, could give me the courage to walk through walls like that. Queer is why I am still here, alive.
Queer is my every breath.
If you don’t respect my identity, why reblog my posts?
If you won’t let me be queer without putting ‘slur’ on who I am, just stop reblogging my posts, okay?
purplespacecats replied: Also like.. people can just blacklist the word queer???? If you have “q slur” but not “queer” blacklisted, what even???? What purpose does tagging things as “q slur” even serve?? It’s misguided at best and sanctimonious condescension more often than not.
florafawner: I always thought this. How weird would it be if I tagged gay things with g slur? Most of us have heard gay being used as a slur wayyyyyyyy more than queer, so it’d only make sense! But it doesn’t make sense.
ALL OF THIS. I’ve finally found something that puts into words how devastatingly painful it is to have your literal core called a slur and who can HONESTLY say in this day and age that queer is a slur they’ve heard more often than “gay”. I mean really.
If you don’t like the word, that’s fine. Don’t use it. But my identity and being is not a slur.
^^^^ yeah some more of this
People act like ‘queer’ is just another word in a historic line of changing variations on lgbt and they ignore that it is a hell of a lot more than that. And that doesnt happen by accident, they ignore it because they don’t want what queer is to exist. ‘Queer’ isn’t some variation on lgbt, it’s something wider, something less controlable, something less definable, something more rebelious, more connected, something with more potential to grow into weird new ways of living and loving and shaping our lives and breaking down systems. It’s freakishly beautiful and I will not let them tame it.
does anyone ever do the opposite of dissociate?? where youre just suddenly and uncomfortably aware of your situation and reality
more to the point why do i get that feeling when im sitting on top of my kitchen table watching a velveeta mac and cheese pack spin in the microwave for three and a half minutes and im just like I Exist I Am Here And Theres Nothing I Can Do About It
okay this one wins, everyone can stop reblogging this now